It's seriously been over 3 months since my last HHM post, so I'm long overdue! Forgive me please, life has been crazy.
The weather in my neck of the woods: There's a cold front moving through, for which I am super grateful and it's a little rainy today. Perfect for some slow-cooking.
Breakfast time, what's on my plate: Nothing so far, whoops. I mean, I have had a spoonful of cream cheese. I'm doing a lazy version of the keto diet, and this fits just fine. I suppose if I wasn't low carb, I would have some toast with it hahah.
On today's to do list: Vacuum the living room, clean the bathrooms, take the girls to the library, run to the grocery store.
Currently reading: The World Before Us by Aislinn Hunter. I'm having a hard time getting into it, but I'm going to try my darndest.
On the T.V. this week: Even though I've seen it a million times before, I'm going to try and finish That 70's Show.
On the menu this week: Making Italian Cream Cheese Chicken in the Insta-Pot today, tomorrow is Pizza Soup, and the rest of this week is TBD.
If I have a few minutes to myself this week, I will: Read my book. Have a pedicure. Take a long walk.
What I'm creating this week: I have absolutely no idea. I need to do something to keep my mind and hands busy.
New recipe I'm trying/want to try this week: Honestly, anything in the InstaPot. My birthday is coming up, and as an early birthday present, my boss got me a big fancy InstaPot. So, I'm Pinterest-ing ALL the recipes.
Favorite photo from the camera:
My husband was off last week on Wednesday, so the older daughter and I had a girls' day. We had dinner at the local deli, and took a small hike to the waterfall in our town. We're having a repeat girls' day this Wednesday. What should we do?
Bible verse, Devotionals, Prayers: This entire country needs prayers. Things are so messed up here and there is so much division.
Monday, September 24, 2018
Happy Homemaker Monday: September 24, 2018
Thursday, September 20, 2018
A Jumble
This is where I come back from one of my disappearing acts.
Trust me, I needed this one.
We lost my Daddy on July 6.
I still feel so incredibly lost sometimes. Like, how is this even real?
How is he gone?
My Dad was always larger than life to me. He could do anything, fix anything. He was my hero. Still is.
Two days before he died, Dad told me, "I'm leaving. I love you guys."
I can still hear him saying "Odchodze" (I'm leaving).
When my friend Ms. Lora died, I knew she would die. But I was still unprepared.
Unprepared is the understatement of the century when it comes to how I feel about Dad being gone. I find myself thinking about two years ago, when Ella and I went to visit him and Mom. I think about joking around with Dad about stupid things and getting the grand tour of the neighborhood and then remembering that he is GONE and I will not have those conversations with him again and it's like I'm being hit by a truck every single time.
And I know that where he is now, there is no more pain, no more cancer, no more sickness. Dad is whole and healthy and reunited with his parents and his older brother. My babies in heaven have met their Pop Pop and that must be so beautiful.
And as much as it hurts to be here, and be Dad-less, I know I'm really NOT Dad-less. Because he's always here. Every time I say something to make my kids laugh, I know Dad's there. Every time I fix some household item, I know Dad's there. Every time I play gypsy music for the girls, I know he's there. Since the day he died, I've been seeing blue butterflies everywhere.
I'm trying. I've wanted to sit down and write a blog about this or that and make my way seamlessly back.
But I couldn't. Not without writing about Dad.
Because I owe him at least this.
At least.
Trust me, I needed this one.
We lost my Daddy on July 6.
I still feel so incredibly lost sometimes. Like, how is this even real?
How is he gone?
My Dad was always larger than life to me. He could do anything, fix anything. He was my hero. Still is.
Two days before he died, Dad told me, "I'm leaving. I love you guys."
I can still hear him saying "Odchodze" (I'm leaving).
When my friend Ms. Lora died, I knew she would die. But I was still unprepared.
Unprepared is the understatement of the century when it comes to how I feel about Dad being gone. I find myself thinking about two years ago, when Ella and I went to visit him and Mom. I think about joking around with Dad about stupid things and getting the grand tour of the neighborhood and then remembering that he is GONE and I will not have those conversations with him again and it's like I'm being hit by a truck every single time.
And I know that where he is now, there is no more pain, no more cancer, no more sickness. Dad is whole and healthy and reunited with his parents and his older brother. My babies in heaven have met their Pop Pop and that must be so beautiful.
And as much as it hurts to be here, and be Dad-less, I know I'm really NOT Dad-less. Because he's always here. Every time I say something to make my kids laugh, I know Dad's there. Every time I fix some household item, I know Dad's there. Every time I play gypsy music for the girls, I know he's there. Since the day he died, I've been seeing blue butterflies everywhere.
I'm trying. I've wanted to sit down and write a blog about this or that and make my way seamlessly back.
But I couldn't. Not without writing about Dad.
Because I owe him at least this.
At least.
Monday, June 4, 2018
Happy Homemaker Monday, June 4, 2018
Good...afternoon!
I hate that I'm always late/rushed to post this, but that's the season of life I live in right now.
My schedule is back to semi-normal, and I work Monday nights again, so at least I'm home in the daytime.
The weather: It's legit GORGEOUS right now, and I'm enjoying the nice day. Open windows and a nice breeze. It can't get any better!
Right now, I am: channeling Carly Rae Jepsen while I unload my dishwasher. Baby's hopefully going down for a nap, and then I can get a few more chores done before work.
Thinking: Trying to plan the week ahead, and work out some budgeting stuff. I would really love to buy another betta fish and a bigger tank (our geriatric fish, LT passed on to the big pond in the sky last week, he is greatly missed), but I don't know if I can swing that this week.
On my reading pile: Same stuff as last week. I've read maybe two pages in that book, there's just no time, and my Kindle is backlit so I read on it in bed.
On my TV: Season 14 of Hell's Kitchen. I got my best friend into it, so it's fun to do a running commentary on it through text. We both think Jon from Season 11 got robbed.
On the menu this week: Tonight is Sausage, Peppers, and Rice. Tomorrow is Beef Stew in the crockpot. I'm not one to make stew in the crockpot, so I could use all the tips.
On my to-do list: Pack up more stuff to donate. We are minimalizing and it feels WONDERFUL.
In the craft basket: I got nothing right now. Everything else has kept me so dang busy, ugh.
Looking forward to this week: Lunch with a friend tomorrow, working in my garden. Getting my moss roses into a pot. I have some outside, but they're an annual so I'm going to see if they do o.k. year round inside in a pot.
Looking around the house: Who left the living room lamp on? Aurgh. Otherwise, it's pretty quiet.
From the camera:
We had some wild weather this past week!!!!
I hate that I'm always late/rushed to post this, but that's the season of life I live in right now.
My schedule is back to semi-normal, and I work Monday nights again, so at least I'm home in the daytime.
The weather: It's legit GORGEOUS right now, and I'm enjoying the nice day. Open windows and a nice breeze. It can't get any better!
Right now, I am: channeling Carly Rae Jepsen while I unload my dishwasher. Baby's hopefully going down for a nap, and then I can get a few more chores done before work.
Thinking: Trying to plan the week ahead, and work out some budgeting stuff. I would really love to buy another betta fish and a bigger tank (our geriatric fish, LT passed on to the big pond in the sky last week, he is greatly missed), but I don't know if I can swing that this week.
On my reading pile: Same stuff as last week. I've read maybe two pages in that book, there's just no time, and my Kindle is backlit so I read on it in bed.
On my TV: Season 14 of Hell's Kitchen. I got my best friend into it, so it's fun to do a running commentary on it through text. We both think Jon from Season 11 got robbed.
On the menu this week: Tonight is Sausage, Peppers, and Rice. Tomorrow is Beef Stew in the crockpot. I'm not one to make stew in the crockpot, so I could use all the tips.
On my to-do list: Pack up more stuff to donate. We are minimalizing and it feels WONDERFUL.
In the craft basket: I got nothing right now. Everything else has kept me so dang busy, ugh.
Looking forward to this week: Lunch with a friend tomorrow, working in my garden. Getting my moss roses into a pot. I have some outside, but they're an annual so I'm going to see if they do o.k. year round inside in a pot.
Looking around the house: Who left the living room lamp on? Aurgh. Otherwise, it's pretty quiet.
From the camera:
We had some wild weather this past week!!!!
Monday, May 28, 2018
Happy Homemaker Monday: May 28, 2018
Good evening, friends! Please take a moment tonight to think about all of the things that we have: all the freedoms, everything. And think of the men and women who made all of this possible with the sacrifice of their lives. Memorial Day is to honor the memory of all those who gave all for this country.
I'm so incredibly LATE posting this.
Why?
Because, in addition to it being Memorial Day, it's also Miss Josie's BIRTHDAY!!!
She's one today!
I apologize for my absence as of late. My Dad underwent chemo, the tumors shrank...and then they came back. Doctors were giving him days to weeks, so the girls and I went to Illinois to see him. We were told to say our goodbyes...and then Dad agreed to undergo chemo again, even though he was told it could kill him.
He did the chemo.
It shrank the tumors again.
He got pneumonia.
We prayed.
Incredibly, Dad continues to beat the odds. He is the strongest human being I know. So, please keep him in your prayers.
The weather: Rain, rain, and more rain. Flash flood warnings until Wednesday, at least. I'm actually at work right now, putting in some hours and I'm watching the rain come down. SIGH.
Right now, I am: Listening to Miranda Lambert, going through the mental checklist of the last few things I have to do here before I can leave, and typing this post. Ha.
Thinking: That I should really dye my hair. The purple has faded some and the bleach-y parts are showing, and I just don't have the time for the upkeep. I'm happiest as a brunette anyway.
On my reading pile: I got a book called "Very Bad Things" from the Dollar Tree to read on my trip to Chicago. I've read maybe 7 chapters. It's a good, easy ready, but life just moves so fast. I'm going to aim to finish it by this weekend.
On my T.V.: Hell's Kitchen, Hell's Kitchen, and more Hell's Kitchen. Also, I'm trying to start 13 Reasons Why, season 2.
On the menu for this week: I need to get back into meal planning, but what with school being done, and me picking up even more work, our evenings are a bit nuts lately. BUT, I am planning Zuppa Toscana, stuffed peppers, and a pot roast this week. Tonight, I made something I'm calling Comfort Chicken, which is a spin off from Chicken a la King.
On my to-do list: Not a lot, I'm ahead of the game today. I have to wash some bottles and pump parts. Otherwise, I'm going to try and rest and read that book.
In the craft basket: Ugh, nothing. And everything. I have so many ideas, but right now, I'm so busy with other stuff...
Looking forward to this week: Couponing and groceries and getting back to my Ibotta, so I can make a little extra cash. Also, the shopping because my freezer is going to be pretty bare bones after this week of meals.
Looking around the house: I'm not at the house, but looking around work...I'm literally the only one here right now, and it's kind of nice.
From the camera:
A little (cup)cake carnage from this morning lolol.
Inspirational quotes, Bible verse, Devotional:
I'm so incredibly LATE posting this.
Why?
Because, in addition to it being Memorial Day, it's also Miss Josie's BIRTHDAY!!!
She's one today!
I apologize for my absence as of late. My Dad underwent chemo, the tumors shrank...and then they came back. Doctors were giving him days to weeks, so the girls and I went to Illinois to see him. We were told to say our goodbyes...and then Dad agreed to undergo chemo again, even though he was told it could kill him.
He did the chemo.
It shrank the tumors again.
He got pneumonia.
We prayed.
Incredibly, Dad continues to beat the odds. He is the strongest human being I know. So, please keep him in your prayers.
The weather: Rain, rain, and more rain. Flash flood warnings until Wednesday, at least. I'm actually at work right now, putting in some hours and I'm watching the rain come down. SIGH.
Right now, I am: Listening to Miranda Lambert, going through the mental checklist of the last few things I have to do here before I can leave, and typing this post. Ha.
Thinking: That I should really dye my hair. The purple has faded some and the bleach-y parts are showing, and I just don't have the time for the upkeep. I'm happiest as a brunette anyway.
On my reading pile: I got a book called "Very Bad Things" from the Dollar Tree to read on my trip to Chicago. I've read maybe 7 chapters. It's a good, easy ready, but life just moves so fast. I'm going to aim to finish it by this weekend.
On my T.V.: Hell's Kitchen, Hell's Kitchen, and more Hell's Kitchen. Also, I'm trying to start 13 Reasons Why, season 2.
On the menu for this week: I need to get back into meal planning, but what with school being done, and me picking up even more work, our evenings are a bit nuts lately. BUT, I am planning Zuppa Toscana, stuffed peppers, and a pot roast this week. Tonight, I made something I'm calling Comfort Chicken, which is a spin off from Chicken a la King.
On my to-do list: Not a lot, I'm ahead of the game today. I have to wash some bottles and pump parts. Otherwise, I'm going to try and rest and read that book.
In the craft basket: Ugh, nothing. And everything. I have so many ideas, but right now, I'm so busy with other stuff...
Looking forward to this week: Couponing and groceries and getting back to my Ibotta, so I can make a little extra cash. Also, the shopping because my freezer is going to be pretty bare bones after this week of meals.
Looking around the house: I'm not at the house, but looking around work...I'm literally the only one here right now, and it's kind of nice.
From the camera:
A little (cup)cake carnage from this morning lolol.
Inspirational quotes, Bible verse, Devotional:
Psalm 30:5 is Josie's life verse.
Have a beautiful week, my friends!!!!
Tuesday, May 1, 2018
I am so ready.
SO READY.
My older sister sent me some pictures of us from her wedding day, almost 18 years ago.
I look so different. Yes, part of it is I'm almost 18 years older, I've carried 5 pregnancies, I have two living children, I work ALLLLLLL the time, I'm pumping for Josie...
But Oh goodness. I hate what I see in the mirror. I hate my weight.
I've decided to revive my weight loss blog, which took one hell of a hiatus while I carried Josie and dealt with the sleepless nights of infancy.
Back then, me staying sane and dealing with one thing at a time was more important than my weight.
But, you guys, I am ready.
I am SO READY to take my life back and to love myself again.
My older sister sent me some pictures of us from her wedding day, almost 18 years ago.
I look so different. Yes, part of it is I'm almost 18 years older, I've carried 5 pregnancies, I have two living children, I work ALLLLLLL the time, I'm pumping for Josie...
But Oh goodness. I hate what I see in the mirror. I hate my weight.
I've decided to revive my weight loss blog, which took one hell of a hiatus while I carried Josie and dealt with the sleepless nights of infancy.
Back then, me staying sane and dealing with one thing at a time was more important than my weight.
But, you guys, I am ready.
I am SO READY to take my life back and to love myself again.
Monday, April 23, 2018
Happy Homemaker Monday: April 23, 2019
Happy Monday! It's a new week and I'm ready to kick butt!
Breakfast time, what's on the plate this morning: A leftover stuffed pepper. My hate for breakfast food at breakfast time is real.
On this week's to do list: Declutter, Declutter, DECLUTTER!!!
Currently Reading: 31 Days to a Happy Mom by Arlene Pellicane. I'm loving it so far!
On the TV this week: Hell's Kitchen, and more Hell's Kitchen. Call me crazy, but I love me some Chef Ramsay.
The weather outside is: It's raining cats and dogs right now. Last week, we had an almost 80 degree day AND snow another day. C'mon, weather get it together!!!
On the menu this week: I'm making Chicken Stew tonight because it's so cold and awful and rainy and windy out. Not sure what the week will bring, but I've got a lot of meat in the freezer to use up, so we shall see.
If I have a few minutes to myself, I will: Take a long, hot shower.
What I'm creating: Beaded skull bracelets with Ella. Just as soon as I get some thinner elastic.
New Recipe I tried, or want to try this week: I made a pesto pasta on Saturday night, with "zoodles" and it was darn good.
From my camera:
my kids are crazy, y'all.
Bible verse, devotional:
Have an amazing week, friends!
Go forth and kick butt!!!!
Breakfast time, what's on the plate this morning: A leftover stuffed pepper. My hate for breakfast food at breakfast time is real.
On this week's to do list: Declutter, Declutter, DECLUTTER!!!
Currently Reading: 31 Days to a Happy Mom by Arlene Pellicane. I'm loving it so far!
On the TV this week: Hell's Kitchen, and more Hell's Kitchen. Call me crazy, but I love me some Chef Ramsay.
The weather outside is: It's raining cats and dogs right now. Last week, we had an almost 80 degree day AND snow another day. C'mon, weather get it together!!!
On the menu this week: I'm making Chicken Stew tonight because it's so cold and awful and rainy and windy out. Not sure what the week will bring, but I've got a lot of meat in the freezer to use up, so we shall see.
If I have a few minutes to myself, I will: Take a long, hot shower.
What I'm creating: Beaded skull bracelets with Ella. Just as soon as I get some thinner elastic.
New Recipe I tried, or want to try this week: I made a pesto pasta on Saturday night, with "zoodles" and it was darn good.
From my camera:
my kids are crazy, y'all.
Bible verse, devotional:
Have an amazing week, friends!
Go forth and kick butt!!!!
Monday, April 16, 2018
On the subject of my Dad
Dad's a great man.
Often funny.
Seldom serious.
Always genuine.
He's been my hero since I was 8 and could live with him full-time. Before that, he was living in the US and my Mom and siblings were living in Poland.
When I was learning English, Dad was pretty military and hardcore about me learning new words. It's one of the only times when I wasn't very fond of him, ha.
Today, I'm grateful for that. Nobody has any clue that English isn't my first language and it's because Dad was so crazy about me learning the language and learning it well.
Easter, 2010.
Neither of us is terribly photogenic.
When Dad was first diagnosed with multiple myeloma in 2013, I didn't hold it together well at ALL. Just ask my husband's friend, the cop, who saw me out running at 3 in the morning, sobbing my heart out. Dad constantly harangued me about family peace and family togetherness, even while he was in the hospital, days away from undergoing a transplant.
Vacation, 2016.
Still as unphotogenic as ever.
Fast forward to this past winter. I said some pretty insensitive things that caused a lot of family turmoil. Dad lectured me pretty harshly, and I was pretty mad. (even though the lecture was damn well deserved). I was immature, and we didn't speak for about a week. I wasn't speaking to anyone. Not him, not my Mom, not my siblings.
One Thursday, at work, I missed a phone call from my sister. The second time she called, I was able to pick up. Dad was in the ER. Nobody knew what was going on. Family disagreements fell by the wayside, nobody slept that night, and the next day dawned a new beginning for this family.
The terrifying beginning of finding out exactly what was wrong with Dad.
The beginning of strengthening of family bonds between my Mom, my sister, and me.
Dad went through a terrible ordeal. In and out of the hospital. Treatments for one thing, only to find out the cancer was back. A bout of C.Diff. Doctors not knowing if treatment would work because cancer coming back in this way is rare. Being told that this was their "last resort." An episode of "swimming away" during a treatment.
My Mom and I have never been close. My sister and I have had periods of time where we've been close, and periods of time where we haven't. Most of that is my personality. During one of our phone calls while he was in the hospital, Dad lectured me again, this time more gently.
"This is about family."
"Everybody needs to get along and love each other."
I don't know exactly when the ice melted. I can't recall the exact moment.
Suddenly, phone calls to my Mom are looked forward to and filled with jokes and laughter.
My sister and I, busy as we both are, find time to text one another funny things. She shares my sarcastic sense of humor.
What hits hard, is Dad was lying in a hospital bed, battling cancer for the second time, weak, tired...and his main thought was US. His wife. His kids. His grandchildren.
my parents with Ella, 2010
My Dad loves children. He loves his children. He loves OUR children (his grandkids). He hasn't met Josie yet, but he will. He asks about my girls all the time and looks at their pictures often. Ella adores her Pop-Pop. She fondly recalls our 2016 trip to Wisconsin.
my parents with Ella, 2016
Dad told me recently that he sees this man at the Family Dollar in his town. This man has two grand-daughters, "one big, one little." He says that this guy always hangs out with his grand-daughters and that he's kind of envious of him. He really really really wants to meet Josie. It's happening, and sooner than he thinks!!! :)
Dad and Ella, 2016
There's only one thing left to say about this amazing guy.
He's defied the odds once again.
The "last ditch effort" WORKED.
The tumors are barely there.
Thank you all for the prayers, God has surely heard them!!!
Often funny.
Seldom serious.
Always genuine.
He's been my hero since I was 8 and could live with him full-time. Before that, he was living in the US and my Mom and siblings were living in Poland.
When I was learning English, Dad was pretty military and hardcore about me learning new words. It's one of the only times when I wasn't very fond of him, ha.
Today, I'm grateful for that. Nobody has any clue that English isn't my first language and it's because Dad was so crazy about me learning the language and learning it well.
Easter, 2010.
Neither of us is terribly photogenic.
When Dad was first diagnosed with multiple myeloma in 2013, I didn't hold it together well at ALL. Just ask my husband's friend, the cop, who saw me out running at 3 in the morning, sobbing my heart out. Dad constantly harangued me about family peace and family togetherness, even while he was in the hospital, days away from undergoing a transplant.
Vacation, 2016.
Still as unphotogenic as ever.
Fast forward to this past winter. I said some pretty insensitive things that caused a lot of family turmoil. Dad lectured me pretty harshly, and I was pretty mad. (even though the lecture was damn well deserved). I was immature, and we didn't speak for about a week. I wasn't speaking to anyone. Not him, not my Mom, not my siblings.
One Thursday, at work, I missed a phone call from my sister. The second time she called, I was able to pick up. Dad was in the ER. Nobody knew what was going on. Family disagreements fell by the wayside, nobody slept that night, and the next day dawned a new beginning for this family.
The terrifying beginning of finding out exactly what was wrong with Dad.
The beginning of strengthening of family bonds between my Mom, my sister, and me.
Dad went through a terrible ordeal. In and out of the hospital. Treatments for one thing, only to find out the cancer was back. A bout of C.Diff. Doctors not knowing if treatment would work because cancer coming back in this way is rare. Being told that this was their "last resort." An episode of "swimming away" during a treatment.
My Mom and I have never been close. My sister and I have had periods of time where we've been close, and periods of time where we haven't. Most of that is my personality. During one of our phone calls while he was in the hospital, Dad lectured me again, this time more gently.
"This is about family."
"Everybody needs to get along and love each other."
I don't know exactly when the ice melted. I can't recall the exact moment.
Suddenly, phone calls to my Mom are looked forward to and filled with jokes and laughter.
My sister and I, busy as we both are, find time to text one another funny things. She shares my sarcastic sense of humor.
What hits hard, is Dad was lying in a hospital bed, battling cancer for the second time, weak, tired...and his main thought was US. His wife. His kids. His grandchildren.
my parents with Ella, 2010
My Dad loves children. He loves his children. He loves OUR children (his grandkids). He hasn't met Josie yet, but he will. He asks about my girls all the time and looks at their pictures often. Ella adores her Pop-Pop. She fondly recalls our 2016 trip to Wisconsin.
my parents with Ella, 2016
Dad told me recently that he sees this man at the Family Dollar in his town. This man has two grand-daughters, "one big, one little." He says that this guy always hangs out with his grand-daughters and that he's kind of envious of him. He really really really wants to meet Josie. It's happening, and sooner than he thinks!!! :)
Dad and Ella, 2016
There's only one thing left to say about this amazing guy.
He's defied the odds once again.
The "last ditch effort" WORKED.
The tumors are barely there.
Thank you all for the prayers, God has surely heard them!!!
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